A chieftain of the Peoples Democratic Party (PDP), Hon. Alhaji Kabiru Muhammadu Garkuwa, tied the knot in style to his two beautiful wives the same day in Plateau state.
The politician got married to two women named Maryam Umar Muhammad and Jamila Musa Ibrahim on Saturday, April 6th in Jos, the capital city of Plateau.
Daylight Reporters had a chat with him and his two wives and they all gave answers to questions people have been asking on how the unique marriage came about..
Garkuwa has been separated from his first wife who had him a child for over a year now. All efforts to reconcile both of them proved abortive until he met Maryam and began another relationship.
The relationship grew and he wanted to Maryam to become his wife. But after some months, he also met Jamila and they began another courtship which also became a hearty love. Again, Garkuwa wanted to marry Jamila. That was where the technicality of how he should go about it began.
He said Jamila presented the least of the problem because he told her outright that he had a relationship going with Maryam. Jamila accepted. But how to tell Maryam he was having another affair and would also want to make her his wife became a challenge. He told Daylight Reporters that he beat about the bush for a while, until he summoned courage and hit the nail on the head.
According to him, Maryam didn’t respond favourably initially but he had to persuade her with different tricks, began spending more time with her and increased the gift items he do buy for her. Above all, he told her that if she truly loved him, his happiness should be her concern, and if marrying her (Maryam) with Jamila would make him happy, then she ought to support it. That did the trick! But what he did not tell both of them initially was that he was planning to wed them on the same day.
“First of all, I am a Muslim and my faith permits me to marry from one to four wives. But the injunction stipulates that if you can’t be just with all the wives, then stick to one wife, but if you can then all the women must be equally treated and equally loved. So, because I think I could, that was why I married the two ladies. They are Maryam Mohammed and Jamila Ibrahim. I love the two of them dearly and they equally love me. My first action in actualizing this is that I told both of them the truth. That is I told Maryam I was going out with Jamila and vice versa, and that I want to marry them both.
“They both consented and I even brought them to meet each other. They then, on their own, established good relationship between themselves and they started exchanging goodwill messages. Their closeness and splendid understanding/relationship between themselves further encouraged me that I can marry both of them without having any problem associated with such marriage. So, I fixed the marriage for same day. I married Maryam by 11am and married Jamila by 2pm. I did courtship with Maryam for two and a half years before the wedding, while that of Jamila was about six months.
“The unique thing which played out here was the level of the relationship between both of them after I connected and told them all that there was. They automatically became friends and bonded. That tremendously encouraged me, and we even began going out together to have lunch, dinner and catch fun generally,” he said.
Having married his both wives the same day, who was going to be the uwar gida and who would be the amarya, Daylight Reporters asked, and his response was that Maryam, of course, is the uwar gida and Jamila the amaryabecause Maryam was the first person he began relationship with before he met Jamila. Nonetheless, he said, he loved them equally. He said he told Jamila’s parents what was going on instantly but that it was tricky telling Maryam’s parents because she was the one he was first going out with.
According to him, he told Jamila’s parents early enough about it and they did not object, but that it was few days to the wedding that Maryam parents knew about. And Maryam’s parents opined that since their daughter knew about the situation and was contented with it, they too have no objection. Garkuwa said after his first marriage with his earlier wife which had issues, he waited for a while in the hope that she will realize her mistakes and come back, but she didn’t until he married Maryam and Jamila.
After his marriage to both girls now, he said, everything is realistically over between him and his earlier wife after waiting for over a year. “Even if she comes for reconciliation now, I would not consider her any longer, : Garkuwa said. He noted that she (his earlier wife), has their daughter in her custody, saying that to the best of his knowledge she is yet to remarry.
“Based on my Islamic faith, the injunction is that you must take good care of your wives, and equally too. That is what I am going to do with my two wives. They are going to get equal right, equal treatment and equal opportunity. My mother and father are both late, and all it is my uncles and other relatives that were with me on this journey, and they tremendously supported me. Even if my parents were alive, they would have supported my marriage to two women at the same time. Why because it is in order and it is not against the religion.
“Importantly also, getting married to two women at the same/on the same day time shows my strength of character and my capacity as a man. It also shows that I am a good leader and a good manager. The reason is because to be able to convince two girls to marry them at the same time and same day, as well as their parents, is not easy at all. This shows that I am a good leader and good administrator.
“So, I am very proud to be able to achieve this feat, I am very proud of myself. Besides, this is unprecedented, and that is why you see many people and media outfit coming to interview me. Anyone who successfully marries one wife is respected in the society, what about one who marries two wives at the same time? “For instance, even the way I happen to convince Maryam about Jamila was strategic. I did not directly tell her at first, and she did not initially accept when I eventually told her.
Hence, the strategy and tactics. First, I showed her my concern and love for her and let her understood that my happiness has strong connection to hers, and she should support me in anything that will make me happy. Again, you know that if you are looking for anything from a woman you have to do things that will her happy. I started giving her with more gifts, visiting her her more often and started spending more time with her so that I can have the time to convince her on my cause.
Discussion about this post