75th birthday: Pete Edochie’s funny proverbs that will crack you up this week

Legendary Nollywood actor, Pete Edochie clocks 75 today, March 7, 2022. The veteran who was born in 1947 has taken to social media to show his gratitude to God.

Recall, the actor had on Sunday March 6, hosted a birthday thanksgiving service in church.

Edochie shared photos of the thanksgiving service on his verified Instagram page and appreciated his fellow Nollywood star, Kanayo O Kanayo for attending the event.

Pete Edochie is very popular for his use of proverbs, irrespective of the roles he plays. The thespian is naturally gifted and effortlessly uses wise sayings in a way that warms the hearts of Nigerians and he has at many times being tagged the wise man of Nollywood.

As today marks the beginning of another year for Edochie, WITHIN NIGERIA brings you 60 of his proverbs that will crack you up this week. Read on:

• A person who sells eggs should not start a fight in the market.
• He who goes to an Owambe wearing shirt and jeans will encounter starvation.
• If something that was going to chop off your head only knocks off your cap, you should be grateful.
• No African girl will choose six packs over six cars. So my sons stop the gym and work hard.
• When the house-rat starts calling itself bushmeat because it is getting fat, it has started passing its boundary.
• The death of a lion cannot be announced by a goat.
• Drinking garri doesn’t mean you are poor, but allowing it to swell before drinking is poverty.
• A deaf husband and a blind wife are always a happy couple.
• The frowning of a he-goat does not stop it from being priced.
• The only person that reads the terms & conditions is the one who writes it.
• In this part of the world, it is bad manners for a child to eat the meat before the main food. The meat on the food is your reward, it should be slowly enjoyed.
• Stupidity is what we all have in common as human beings, but some people insist that improving it is their entitlement.
• He who always thinks the soup is too much for the eba cannot handle greatness.
• A man who hangs around a beautiful girl without saying a word ends up fetching water for guests at her wedding.
• If a man wants to grow a long tooth, he should have the lip to cover it.
• People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.
• The cow in a hurry to go to America will come back as a corned beef.
• He that is looking for expiry date on Agege bread is not worthy of being called hungry.
• The little opportunity given opportunity given to a monkey to wear clothes does not guarantee it to join the dining table.
• Beware of the naked man who offers you clothes.
• When a goat laughs upon hearing that a lion is around, one needs to find out what grass it has been eating.
• By the time the fool has learnt the game, the players have dispersed.
• A girl may never get married if she waits for the perfect man.
• It is a man who does not know how to enjoy life that finishes the meat first when he is served food.
• As powerful as a king is, he cannot command anyone to pass faeces for him.
• A diplomat is one who thinks twice before saying nothing.
• Those who had their nuts cracked by a benevolent spirit should not forget to be humble.
• A man who swallows a whole coconut has a complete faith in his anus.
• The walls don’t only have ears, they now see.
• A child who asks questions does not become a fool.
• Whoever presents his own head to break coconut will not partake in the eating of it.
• When the cock is drunk, he forgets about the hawk.
• No matter how kind a man is, he will never give his wife as a gift to his friends.
• If you sell your father’s land to buy a trumpet where will you stand to blow it?
• The wolf on the hill is not as hungry as the wolf climbing the hill.
• The buttocks are like married couple, though there is constant friction between them, they will still love and live together.
• He who throws party without jollof rice, shall taste the bitter wrath of the gods.
• If you sell a drum in your own village, you get the money and keep the sound.
• Those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music.
• The plaintain that refuses to ripen because it doesn’t want to be fried will be used for plantain chips.
• A man who counts his money after withdrawing from the ATM has trust issues.
• The house that pound yam noisily thinks the silent ones don’t eat.
• When one’s goat get missing, the aroma of a neighbour’s soup get suspicious.
• Never open the door for an armed robber, let them break it, it’s part of their job.
• One man’s food is every other man’s food, just because one idiot refuses to eat it doesn’t make it poison.
• The chief who doesn’t know what to say says that his friend has said what he would have said.
• No matter how rich you are, you cannot pay for your sins.
• Be careful about the rumours you hear about a lady, it either comes from a man who can’t have her or a lady who can’t compete with her.
• Just because you met them at the church doesn’t mean they’re the one, demons go to church too.
• Kindness is like butter, it works best when you spread it around.
• Sometimes you have to play the role of a fool to fool the fools who thinks they are fooling you.
• Give them a chair if they can’t stand your Success.
• A wise person knows that there is something to be learned from everyone.
• Politicians are the same all over. They promise to build a bridge even where there’s no river.
• The words of the elders do not lock all the doors; they leave the right door open.
• Be careful who you trust! Salt and Sugar are both white.
• If you have a mum, there is nowhere you are likely to go where a prayer has not already been.
• A woman’s greatest perfume is the fragrance of her man’s success.
• No matter how dark the room is, a man will always find his way to the woman’s breasts.
• When a girl has beauty without brains, the private part suffers the most.

Incase you missed it, here are some of Chiwetalu Agu’s popular and funny catchphrases. Read here