I still have the scar – Lojay opens up on 6 year scary domestic abuse experience with ex-lover

Award winning singer cum vocalist, Lojay has opened up on being in an abusive relationship in the past in an interview with Pulse.

He admitted that the woman who was once his lover had previously stabbed him, and the wound was is visible on his body.

The brain behind the hit song ‘Monalisa’ said that the union lasted six years, starting when he was 16 and ending only when he was 22.

The woman, who also happened to be his first love, had her good and bad times, but the violent portion began with tiny assaults and attacks like tossing shoes when she got upset, which the singer admitted to having found amusing at the time until things became violent and more physical.

He added that because the woman had so many positive traits, he didn’t realize that the actions were abusive at the time. In Lojay’s words:

“she stabbed me with a fork; that day was hilarious. She smashed a kettle on my head and dented that sh*t. Then, she stabbed me in the hand with a fork. It is a horror story; the mark is with me forever. The funny thing about the moment is that when I look back, the first strike she took was directly to my chest but because it was a fork, it didn’t really cut a lot, but what if it was a knife?”

“…the bad part was that at the time, I didn’t even realize that it was abuse. Because at the time, she’d do like 30 good things and then do like 2 f**d up things.”

The celebrity then spoke about the moment the romance came to an end. He said that he was ill and that while he was sipping water, the lady hit him in the face. He claimed that all he could do was advise her to go since he had feelings for her.

Lojay claims that the woman didn’t leave silently on the specified day. She borrowed a more aggressive approach and even came dangerously close to damaging the singer’s car. He continued:

…in six years I had never asked her to leave my space. She didn’t leave quietly, infact, she almost crashed my car. This is a serious issue. That night, I sh*t you not, it was first an attack, and then it was her asking me to open my phone”

When asked if he cheated in the relationship, the singer said he didn’t particularly cheat as there was an eight-month-long breakup in their relationship. Lojay stated:

“…we broke up for 8 months so, it wasn’t like direct cheating, there was distance and it was complicated. It wasn’t directly cheating and as at the time we decided to come back together, I wasn’t cheating on her with anybody. But there were some people that she wouldn’t have appreciated me talking to and she thought I was talking to, so she went through my phone and saw that someone replied a message, but there was no message from me, which meant I had deleted our conversations. She put a knife to my face and told me to open my phone, she stabbed the bed and dragged it down to show me the knife was effective”

The Tonongo crooner added that the lady would always want to get him to use violence against her in an effort to “balance the odds.” And because it’s not who he is and he didn’t grow up with that sort of nurture, he vowed never to touch her.

He ultimately admitted that the woman’s cunning behavior was what finally broke his spine. Lojay said:

“…after everything, my mind just told me to go downstairs and I saw her in my car and the car was on. Apparently, she wanted to drive out so I quickly shouted that they should lock the gate. So I went to the car, she was calling her sister blah blah blah. Here is the scary part: when the caretakers of the building where I was staying came out and asked what happened, she told them she was running away from me because I was hitting her. At this point, it dawned on me that this was danger”

The Monalisa crooner used this to express the fact that he never sings anything just for the sake of singing; all his songs are drawn from real-life issues and expressions. In even Tonongo, one of his hit songs, he said the encounter with the stripper in the song was real.

Additionally, the singer admitted that despite her repeated attempts, he had never let her reenter his life. He claimed that because he had become so enraged by such situations that even the slightest indication of violence would force him to leave, he could never put himself in such a predicament again.

He claimed that as a result of her experience with her, everything he wants and expects from a relationship—as well as his criteria for it—has changed.  In his words:

“I remember the first time I played my EP for TMXU, he said “you look like the songs that you make, you look like that guy” and that guy is a product of everything I’ve been through. The person that Lojay is, the phrases, the words, the way he structures his words, the way he speaks about women Is based on his experiences. That’s just who I am now and I just can’t find myself in such situations anymore. You can get one slap in, but that’s the end.”